Hello and good day to everyone. I was just putting up some new pics and realized that I haven't posted a journal entry in a long time. My last entry was pretty depressing (almost to the point where it was funny). So anyways, here is a more up-lifting "Thoughts from Nikki" journal.

I have finally realized that I'm the only one that can LET me be happy. Most people can't be truly happy on there own. They can survive (that's what I’ve done for most of my life, just survived). Sure, hanging out with family, friends, and people in general can make you happy, but that feeling of euphoria is only temporary. When everyone leaves, you get this "I wish I could do that again" or what I like to call "The Rewind-This-Moment Syndrome". I tend to find that people get downright sad and almost disappointed after a social gathering. They wish they had made plans for the gathering/get together/party to last longer.

Furthermore, I have realized that if you want to do the things that you love, you may have to do them on your own. I love Italian food (specifically Raviolis). Most people think it is taboo for a woman to go to a restaurant by herself. I’m not going to hang around home, waiting for someone to give me an hour of there day. I am perfectly content with going to a restaurant by myself. Sure it’s a little awkward when the waitress asks "How many?" and you say, "Just one". You usually get odd looks from your waiter, water pourer person, and even other patrons eating at the restaurant. They think "poor, poor girl." I think "haha, I don’t need to fight over bread." Anyways, dress up and eat dinner by yourself tonight at a nice restaurant. The feeling you get from the freedom and self-sustainability are amazing.

I have a few more things to say, but I have to go potty and eat some breakfast. So I think I will let you go for now.